The Grass is Always Greener

This blog was meant to be mostly written in the month leading up to my 22nd birthday, it was a good plan but I'll keep going since I only ended up posting twice. It's summer, I'm enjoying this week off before work and research starts. I also found a website called Wishbomb that allows me to post goals and deadlines. I find I always have great ideas for projects but don't organize myself well enough to undertake them. It's actually nice to set a goal and see the amount of days there are in a summer, I've set aside blocks of times for various activities--a hundred days to really develop a writer's blog, thirty days to write a short story, and roughly thirty days to rewrite a research paper. The important thing is for me to produce, no matter how unpolished something might look. Like this blog post. I've gone off topic. You should see how many started and unfinished blog posts, letters and stories I have saved on a document. It gets reused, but it's better to just put something out there and maybe come back and tweak later.

It's funny the things we learn from our mothers. My mom has had a lot of wisdom to share, it's interesting to see what applies and what doesn't, in terms of how our life experiences are becoming different. I thought I would marry like my mother out of college and follow my husband around the world like she did. Many of the women I admired shared similar experiences. They shared a joint calling with their husbands, and often became full-time mothers. I thought mine would be the same. I imagined a career to be a means of support and a way of getting by until my turn came. I never dreamed or desired to be a "career woman," to me that was too, singular. A woman friend I was speaking to the other day, who shared a similar life experience as my mother, said she envied me pursuing a career! Envied! And I, in turn, protested, "But I wanted the life that you had!" She admitted there were pros and cons to both, and in honesty they are different callings, with special blessings accompanying each. I never thought I would want something so much in terms of a career, and knowing what I want makes seven to eight years in school feel like nothing. I'm all for marriage, but that's not the plan God has for me at this moment. Time is with me right now and I'm going to use it. Rather than holding out and thinking what if what if, I realize I have all the time in the world.